crispy and delicious

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 00:03:37 GMT

01:30 License plate in front of me: "Kings 12-4" License Holder: In case of Rapture, this car will be un-manned. Doesn't G-d prefer humility? #
01:43 @Devi13 At least they're generous? #

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Mon, 09 Nov 2009 00:01:19 GMT

00:52 When I'm 30 can I please just spontaneously turn into Liz Lemon? That is my dream. What if I already have a steady man friend? #BillyParish #
00:53 lol @Ulyth I have been spelling it BillyParish and not #BillyParrish as it should be. My bad! #

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Sun, 08 Nov 2009 00:01:49 GMT

00:56 @TheGothBunny I wear shoes those size! What've you got? #
14:32 Had a horrible night last night for no reason other than I was tired out of my mind. Going to see the kids today. Hope that goes better. #
20:58 Not going to see the kids today. Going to pick them up from school instead on Friday. Muuuuch better. And now: Ulyth! #BillyParish #
23:03 I spent all day sleeping. Good choice. Back to sleep now! #BillyParish #

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Sat, 07 Nov 2009 00:01:19 GMT

22:53 @petridishes What if the world really does run out of lions? #

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Sat, 17 Oct 2009 00:03:53 GMT

16:11 UGH STUFFED NOSE WHY #
19:32 Going to RenFaire Scottish weekend w/ my brother tomorrow. Thoughts on dressing like a chav? Looking at you, Rache! #
20:03 @Hunky_Dory If you don't know what a chav is you don't get to cast a ballot >:( #

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Fri, 16 Oct 2009 00:03:34 GMT

13:36 I have completely lost my voice and I have an oral test today in Arabic. Awesomesauce! #

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Thu, 15 Oct 2009 00:05:45 GMT

08:21 Waking up at 4am should be against the law. #
14:05 Incident at work, and now I'm home all shook up. #
23:49 I am having trouble with my math homework. Requesting volunteers for help! #

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Wed, 14 Oct 2009 00:03:19 GMT

23:08 Person I blocked is IMing me now. No idea who they are, except from OB. And they are moving to Japan because of an anime. Uhhh? #
23:18 @NanaMilkTea Actually, it's an anime about a debris station in space. Kawaii janai! #
23:21 Can I double block someone on AIM? #

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Sat, 10 Oct 2009 00:00:30 GMT

12:03 I dreamed last night about being in Edinburgh. I hung out with Dante, Richard, and Sandra and it was awesome. #
22:50 I'm dying squirtle #

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Fri, 09 Oct 2009 00:00:32 GMT

17:13 Doing just enough reading to get by. I would be a horrible Lit. major. Siiigh. #
23:22 Playing spider solitaire in EN101. I forgot how much fun it was! #

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Thu, 08 Oct 2009 00:00:24 GMT

16:25 I want baked goods! And coffee. And a dry shower. And my room to be clean. Want want want want #
21:24 I got my halloween dress! It's so red. I love it! #

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Wed, 07 Oct 2009 00:00:36 GMT

01:59 @KatSteel That's amazing!! You've got to tell us when it airs. #
09:21 Woke up 4 times in the night b/c of extreme stomach pains and cold sweat. I am the most unhappy panda. #
23:16 Ugh God why is it so cold in my room? I can't stop shivering. #

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Tue, 06 Oct 2009 00:00:48 GMT

00:55 Ooohhh tempura I am so full #
02:15 I just realized the stupid babysitter in The Incredibles is named Kari. Duuuuuuurf #
02:26 Also, people need to stop saying DC has a bad dating scene. Not our fault you can't get any. #
03:04 @mark_argent That's within your zone what you've deemed a horrible dating zone. You said MD/DC/VA. Still not our fault. #
17:15 I think I have joined a cult. Also, I have NO MONEY so paychex please be fat like a Thanksgiving turkey. #
20:51 Derp derp derp. #
21:42 I need a new travel mug. We used to have a million and now we have 0. What is going on, family? #

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Sun, 03 May 2009 00:01:52 GMT

17:15 @YUKO I got your message this morning bitch!! I love you so bad and I'm so sorry you broke your toe. I'll be on call duty tonight ok? #
17:19 New development: I like Bourbon? But only Maker's Mark. Also @mheart I <3 HAMTHRAX #
17:19 #HAMTHRAX #
17:20 tic tac toe four in a row hurrrrrrf #

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Sat, 02 May 2009 00:01:45 GMT

14:22 I need to stop staying out so late on week nights. I forget that I am a lady with early morning responsibilities. That suck. #
14:24 @Hunky_Dory I just saw that and went :( #
14:24 Hey twitter stop deciding what I should be interested in. Your Trending Topics are not what I want to read. #
15:08 @kiplings no I'm just sayin that I drink but I ain't no alcohol'hic so don't you go makin me go to any damn meetins #

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Fri, 01 May 2009 00:02:23 GMT

00:19 Dinner is for losers. Drinking is for winners! I am a winner. #
00:19 I just re-read my own tweet as "dinner is for lobsters" #
13:49 I am very sleepy! But now I know a place in DC with $6 mojitos and $2 shots of tequila. #
15:39 @JohnBooty @Yuko @mheart @popecorky LET'S DO SOME SHOTS #
15:39 No seriously, I love tequila. #
15:40 Not, like, more than I love my dog or my family or whatever but I do enjoy a good slam down with some lime. #
15:41 Guys I'm not an alcoholic don't look at me like that ok #
22:30 I'm watching some kind of movie with a short, fat blue face guy and a burned up black dude. What is this shit? #
22:37 Am I watching "Spawn"? Dude's teeth are heinous. #

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Thu, 30 Apr 2009 00:02:24 GMT

03:08 I wish I could be happy all the time. Being sad is stupid and I hate it. #
13:17 @Yuko next time I am trashed on a Saturday and not having mind-blowing sex I promise I'll call you okay? #
13:17 Furious morning, furiously running, furiously falling down. I am the paradigm of grace. #
13:21 @TheGothBunny www.dcyogaweek.com/mall2009.html Y/N #
13:21 GUYS I UPDATE MY TWITTER A LOT ALL AT ONCE ISN'T THAT HILARIOUS #
14:55 @AnyaLogan Whelp, my hopes and dreams are crushed now. Thanks. :( #
15:28 @AnyaLogan clearly I can't read. My heart is filled with light and joy. And oh god work please don't kill me. #
15:32 OK no one talk to me any more for a bit I think my brain will explode. #
20:22 @YUKO I WILL KILL YOU BITCH I SWEAR TO GOD It's not even like CPR training is hard to find JAYZUZ #

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Wed, 29 Apr 2009 00:02:31 GMT

00:31 Not in the mood to hear skinny people joke about how they're sooooo fat. Shut up please. #
00:58 If I just run on the elliptical forever will I magically get skinnier? Someone say yes please. #
02:14 New gym routine starting tomorrow: 2x tues, thurs, 1x mon, wed, fri. Might kill me, but at least I'll die beautiful. #
03:00 @mheart Honestly, sometimes it hurts simply because you can joke about it and I can't. You are skinny. I am overweight. No jokes for me. #
11:21 @xenoletum Thanks so much, hun. Sometimes it just kills me that I'm not a size 2 and then I go on a hatred binge. I'll be ok in a bit. #
15:43 I am too tired and too hungry to deal with this crap right now. Doctors, please do your jobs before I fire you for keeps. #
21:25 @TheGothBunny The problem mostly is that if I go to Annapolis I'm obligated to fall into the black hole that is lunch with the family. #

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Tue, 28 Apr 2009 00:02:37 GMT

03:45 Weekend over again. Zoo and tequila and the zoo again and friends and cuddling and too much too much heat. #
12:55 This morning needs a re-do already. Sorry Tifa! (dog, not video game durr) #
15:23 @TheGothBunny Isn't Annapolis about a million miles away? Btw yoga week ($5 classes) is starting next week in DC. Come down! #
15:24 Ok everyone don't lick a stranger today. This swine flu thing's got legs. Short, stubby, piggy legs. #
16:46 Oh my god I feel like I'm drunk. Head is spinning, can't concentrate. What's going on? #
18:52 No, I'm not a doctor, but I can still read a chart and that's a forged prescription. Asking for a doctor who isn't here won't help. Dumbass. #
22:59 I need a haircut but shit's expensive. Arrarrr someone cut my hair ok? #
23:01 God ranks higher in my tweetcloud than Jeff. Whoops! Jeff Jeff Jeff <3 #
23:28 @fallingup42 What's the news, blue suede shoes? When you coming home? Also, don't hate me for rhyming. #

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Sun, 26 Apr 2009 00:01:51 GMT

13:56 Turns out I don't like waking up alone on weekends. In other news, where my coffee at? #
16:09 I love Michelle Obama so much. I wish I was that hot. Rawr, Mrs President. #

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Sat, 25 Apr 2009 00:02:06 GMT

03:48 Shep, I am shocked at your language. Americans don't say fuck, goddamn it. #
04:06 Good night, moon. #
10:29 @magicalinternet Are you sure they allowed it the first time? It's a pre-recorded show, not live. I saw it but can't remember the beep. :/ #
10:30 In today's news: I'm not leaving my apartment until the Crazy is out of here. #

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Fri, 24 Apr 2009 00:02:03 GMT

01:55 Stomach hurts so bad. Ugghhhhhhh #
02:40 @Foofad Don't you want to know how to cross dress and be sexy? #
03:49 I am such a girl. Big sighs for Mr Darcy. #
13:16 I am so angry I can barely speak. Her cat PEED on my BED. How does she not apologize and then clean up!? I want her out NOW. #
14:04 @kiplings Morning sex is a great way to begin any day. Also, happy borfday you old lady!! #
16:20 ;OAIJER;JF;AOEJI INCOMPREHENSIBLE RAGE #
17:25 Because I love it: RT @NicoleBlondin Best spelling error of the day: whorses #

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Thu, 23 Apr 2009 00:02:17 GMT

13:01 I don't know that this posted before. Here is a video about my crazy-ass job! Please watch. tinyurl.com/ckxcad #
13:03 Oh wait I guess it did because @Roobots replied. The sirens are real (I remember that take) but yeah I think she messed with it. #
15:14 Arms are so tired. Rawrrrr #
18:44 Mr Irizarryhoeksem your name is a ton of fun to say but is hella difficult to spell. #
20:16 @Ulyth @Yuko NIGGA PLEASE #

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Wed, 22 Apr 2009 00:02:19 GMT

02:07 CAT HAIR EVERYWHERE OH GOD HELP I'M DROWNING #
02:49 BRA RAGE! Cute bras are never in my size wahh wahh see me bitch about having bit tits. Seriously, though, why. #
03:07 @Yuko I know, right? I've got maybe two that fit and I'm getting bored! #
04:53 Why am I not sleepy? I'm always sleepy! This doesn't make sense. #
04:54 @Kalshassan re: fops Don't worry, hun, I'll tell you when you're older. Alternatively: Otakubooty.com #
04:59 @grathwohl Noooooo whyyyyyyyyy #
13:43 Get to yell at the medical assistants in about 15 minutes. Gimmie mah monay! #
15:23 @TheGothBunny I circumvent that problem by not wearing bikinis. I do not have the right shape, so I do not tempt fate. Rhyming! #
19:44 My clinic is on youtube! And I have hugely fat arms! tinyurl.com/ckxcad #
19:45 @Roguesamus I was going to get the butternut squash ravioli but it seemed... iffy. What's your verdict? #
23:59 Beat myself up at the gym today trying to get over a rough day at work. Can't lift my arms and I think I'm going to pass out. #

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Tue, 21 Apr 2009 00:02:14 GMT

18:20 Rain is effin up my car and my brain. Should be getting new parts soon and playing at car mechanic. I hope I get extra greasy. #
19:32 I've got something on my mind but I can't think of what it is. #
19:48 Coworkers, you are asking for just enough rope to hang yourselves with. Fine by me, but please hurry it up. #
23:05 Lady, please get your menagerie out of my apartment. I said you could stay here for the weekend, not move in all your shit for life. #

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